I'm told (by the journal!) that if I tell whom I admire you could probably tell a great deal about my hopes, dreams, and personal style. So let's try it! The theory, according to Claude M. Bristol is that "we become what we envisage". Not surprisingly the people whom I admire do not reflect my outer style but represent things that I strive for as a reflection of who I am.
1. Nelson Mandela. We all have choices in our lives. Turn the other cheek kind of moments. As a child of an abusive home I tend to get my feathers up and see backing down as a sign of weakness. Oh, but Nelson Mandela. There is a man. Not a perfect man (as his family relationships attest), but who is? I read his autobiography The Long Walk to Freedom last summer and was so inspired. For the short cut version, you can rent the movie Invictus (which does have the added bonus of Matt Damon!).
2. Maya Angelou. Many similarities to Nelson Mandela in that her life was not lived down a perfect path. There are many, especially in conservative circles, that would question her morals and faith. But she is real. To think that we almost lost this voice through her personal tragedy. What amazing wisdom the world would have missed. I have grown much over the last couple of years by embracing your philosophy of "when you know better, you do better". So much easier to forgive past wrongs and hurt when you can contemplate that thought. And, how cool do you have to be to be Oprah's mentor! Oprah would also be on my list, but I'm branching out. I'm sure Oprah will be discussed plenty throughout the course of my blogging experience!
3. Benazir Bhutto. Her book Islam, Democracy and the West could be a primer for many current crisis in the Islamic world. Yes, Islam and democracy can co-exist. But the west (especially the UK and the US!) are going to have to be comfortable with THEIR version of democracy. It always amazes me that as a young country we have made so many of these same mistakes, and would never dream of thinking it was ok for another country to "help" us get it right. Besides, I love the look on my teenagers face when I book talk this book. Short version: (hold up the book cover) Who can tell me about Benazir Bhutto? (silence) Ok, I'll give you some hints. Let's start with the title. What do you assume about her? (She knows something about Islam.....). What if I told you that she was a Muslim woman from Pakistan? What would you think the book is about? (LOTS of comments on how she can't be educated, can't leave her house, home come her face isn't covered....) What if I told you she served as Prime Minister of Pakistan more than once? (disbelief, she's a woman. how could that possibly be true?) Yes, the democratic leader of the world (U.S.) has yet to elect a female President, yet Bhutto served twice in Pakistan. A true leader, bridge builder, intelligent, compassionate woman. I believe the current Afghan/Pakistani situation would be very different if she hadn't been assassinated. Yet she was willing to serve the cause knowing full well it would probably mean her life.
4. My Husband. Yeah, I complain about him more than I should. Men and women are different! Can lead to interesting frustrations in day to day living. But by any account my husband should have given up in childhood. The things the man has experienced, endured and come through are remarkable. I know that my son is the amazing young man he is because of his example. I start everyday with a warm car and fresh brewed cup of green tea. Better than flowers any day.
5. My sister. Strong, beautiful, determined. Amazing. Ambitious, caring and kind. How she has lived this past year beyond the grief astounds me. Her willingness to continue to invest her love and energy in other people and their needs is humbling. I've learned so much. Much of my grief comes not just from the loss of Phoebe last year, but the loss of the mothering Phoebe had from Kim and Kim for Phoebe. And yet there is hope. A new life about to join us. Anticipation and anxiety are travelling the same path. I look at my son differently every day.
Ok, now it's your turn? Whom do you admire? And what does my list say about me? Time for some chatter people!
Expressing gratitude today for:
1. An inexpensive camera that still allows me to take my silly pics of birds, animals and flowers.
2. The bird sanctuary on a beautiful, spring day.
3. A pair of sandhill cranes that made me miss my husband.
I need to gather my thoughts.... I will comment on this later.
ReplyDeleteOk... I'm ready to comment. I've given this a lot of thought and have found those people whom I most admire are not famous. They are every day people who have influenced my life in positive ways and in their own unique way have shaped who I am and who I continue to become.
ReplyDelete1. Edna Dafoe: June 9 1894 - June 1993 Pioneer Woman. My paternal great grandmother, died 7 days before her 99th birthday. She was a strong, silent woman. She never spoke much about her life. Growing up we would take her to church every Sunday. This was during the time she lived in a Senior Living Home after the death of her husband, Jesse. My mother would weekly go over and "set" grandma's hair on Saturday. It would be nice for Sunday and then be "done" for the rest of the week. I often would go with my mom... we would walk into Grandma's room and ask "How are you today Grandma?" her answer never faltered.... "Oh... fair to middlin'" and then a smirky smile would creep across her face and she would chuckle as if she was keeping some sort of secret from the rest of us.
You never heard her complain. Even when something was actually wrong... she never complained. It was always "oh... it's nothing. It doesn't bother me much". She always wanted to know what was going on with everyone else and rarely talked about herself. Matter of fact, I can only remember one specific incident where we did actually get her talking about her life .... and I soaked it up like a beautiful sunshine day.
She married Jesse Dafoe at the ripe old age of 18...which was actually pretty old for her day. They packed up what they owned and joined a wagon train... headed West. Oregon was the destination. She never really said why they wanted to go so far away from everyone and everything they knew... but they did. A couple of years later they had their first child, a daughter... Opal... my grandmother. Opal was less then 5 years old when Jesse's father became ill and they had to return to Michigan to help with the family farm. My great grandmother told this story with fire and spunk... however, the light faded slightly when she spoke of needing to come home. The only thing she said of the event was "We had to do what we had to do, but if were up to me we never would have left Oregon."
I always felt a kinship with my great grandmother. For as long as I can remember I've had a love of the Pacific NorthWest. Great Grandma told us that story just a couple of years before she passed. As she told it I felt this warm glow of recognition... THIS is where my fascination with Oregon has it's roots. It's in my blood.
She was a woman of fortitude. She sacrificed her dreams for her family, but never lost her joy. I miss her.
2. Jolene Bricker Pemberton. My sister. I was 12 when she was born and no one else in between. It's quite odd to be 12 and have a baby sister. As a first born that sense of needing to care for everyone else goes into hyper drive in a situation such as this. I have adored watching her grow in the beautiful woman she is today.
She has always been the sort of person to make a decision and stick with it. Tenacious. She is so tenacious. She has over come so many obstacles. During a time when many would have given up, sunk into a hole and let life pass them by... she decided she would not go silently into the night. She rose above and overcame the difficulties presented to her. She is honest about her situation. She will not lie and tell you it's all fun and roses. She will tell you she struggles. She is real. Yet, she also will tell you she can rise above.
I don't always agree with her choices, but I respect her choices. She fiercely loves Jesus, even though she will say she struggles with anger toward Him regarding her situation. She has shown me life isn't easy...but there is always light.
3. Kim Anderson. My dear dear friend. There are so many things to admire about this woman... and so many things to be thankful for that she is in my life. She has taught me so much about advocating for myself and those I love. Encouraging me to learn, educate myself and research things about my own health and those that I love she helped me strip off the lemming costume and take a proactive approach to my health and well being. It wasn't that I didn't WANT to before... I had just never been exposed to that type of thinking before meeting Kim. It opened my eyes and fit with my personality and I have embraced it fully since that time.
ReplyDeleteShe is strong. Much stronger then I think even she knows. She has faced so much in her life and somehow continues to think of others and always have time to reach out and help those in need. Lend an ear. Lend a hand. Send a kind word. She is beautiful inside and out and I am so grateful I call her friend.
4. Pamela Holzberger Buckley: Lifetime friend. Pamela is a mother of 4. Two girls, two boys. I have watched her children grow and watched her grow as a mother and admire her so much. She has traveled through many chapters during her motherhood journey, always striving to become something better then the day before. She allows her children to be the individuals they are, never trying to stuff them into a predetermined mold or trying to make them be like one of their siblings. She encourages their differences. She teaches them kindness and strength. She showers them with love. She has sacrificed for them, at times feeling like she lost herself...but ultimately finding her way and being a strong example of a strong wife, mother, and woman. She is a friend who never judges, but always embraces.
The thing with each of these people is I know they have not only touched my life but the lives of many around them. They may never grace the cover of Time Magazine... they may never have their name spoken around the world by millions....but the impact they have had on my life and the life of those that cross their path is genuine and permanent. I love each of these women and am grateful for their influence in my life.
Beautiful! Thanks so much for sharing.
ReplyDeleteWow...I'm truly humbled. I have a harding time getting past the pettiness, selfishness and frustration I see in meself so often. To have two of the women in my life that I admire greatly see incredibly good things in me...just wow.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate all that you both bring to my life. You both are such strong, courageous, incredible women and some of the most amazing moms I know. Thank goodness for first-born girls in my life! ;) You have made differnt choices and walk very different paths, but I see the results of all you do in your kids. They are incredible. If I can do half as well I will count myself a success.
While I am inspired by some well-known people, those I truly admire are those who have touched my life personally. Two additional women come immediately to mind:
Lorraine Yaklin, my maternal grandmother. She was one of the most giving people I have ever known. She was someone who always felt truly present when you were with her. She lost her mom at a very young age and was shuffled from family member to family member. Somewhere along the way, the family lost track of her true birthday. We came across her birth certificate later in her life and realized she was a year younger than we had always thought! but she never used her difficult childhood as an excuse. She lived her life, loved her family and friends and gave to everyone around her, whether out of her abundance or her lack. She was the truest example of Christ that I ever met and was strong in her faith. Not because she said the "right" words, but because she lived what she believed.
She was taking Communion to shut-ins when she was in her 70s, usually to people even younger than her!
When I was with her, she was never concerned about whether her house was clean enough or the furnishings were new enough. She was content to spend time with me.
Her generosity of spirit is something I truly aspire to.
Shirley Bush, my mother-in-law. I wish I had had years more with her, but I cherish the time I had. I loved her matter-of-fact attitude--you always knew where you stood with her! But she was not at all malicious. It was more that there was no sense wasting time beating around the bush!
I love that she never stopped learning and growing. She was an incredible artist, and I love that we have many of her paintings. They have so much of her personality and spirit, and mean more to me than her "things" ever could. Even with her art she kept reaching and learning new techniques.
She was a wine lover and generously shared that love with others. She had learned about wine and wine tasting and was very knowledgeabel and ver clear about what she liked and what she didn't...no sweet white wines for her!
She was incredibly well-read (no surprise considering she was a reading teacher!) and always had something to contribute to the conversation. I hope, like her, I will never stop reaching to learn new things.